Showers.
And when people take them.
People who are hygienic tend to have at least one occasion
of cleaning themselves per day. I understand that there are those who come from
much colder climates and don’t tend to perspire as much and thereby shower less
- please note that still freaks me right out. Then there are those, like me,
who live in ridiculous heat and humidity. If you’ve ever been in a sauna then
you’ve been in my country. There’s nothing quite like walking through what
feels like someone else’s heat waves 24/7. Clearly this means that you tend to be
a lot sweatier than the average bear and must bathe to avoid social ostracism.
I take one shower a
day – at night. Unless I’ve been intermittently mud wrestling in manure, in
which I may bathe more, I will have one showering experience every twenty-four
hours. Some people take two. This doesn’t make sense. Why have a shower before
bed and then when you wake up again in the morning? Some say it wakes them up
for work. I say it is odd considering the act of showering is to cleanse oneself
and unless you are practising extreme zumba in your sleep and sweating
profusely then it is just a waste of water. Then there are those who only take
one shower – in the morning. This also doesn’t make sense. Why drag the sweat
of your day into bed with you at night? Who wants to sleep in the germs they
have accumulated throughout a day? You may have rubbed up against all kind of
nasties and now they are invading your boudoir (oo-err).
In the summer you don’t have to be an obese teen jumping
around in an enclosed Justin Beiber concert for five hours to rack up a
righteous stink. In fact it only takes pulling off the sheet and sitting up in
the morning to be covered in a layer of perspiration.
All in all if you don’t have at least one shower at night time
then I’m not going anywhere near your bed without a disposal chemical
protection jumpsuit.
